Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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