I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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