I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
