Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
