I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
