so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
