nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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