so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
