At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize