There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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