i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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