I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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