she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize