Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
