marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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