so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
vagina is talking i cant
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Green mimosas i think yes
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Randomize
