three words: i give head
three words: not that well
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
