The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Enjoy the penises
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
