Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
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