As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
