Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
