I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
