walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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