I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Randomize
