Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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