the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
sex in a hospital.. check
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
