just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize