Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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