I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
wanna go halves on a baby?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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