having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
