I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
