Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Randomize
