I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
