U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
My feet surprised me
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