i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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