i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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