people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
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