2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
