return my video game
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Pooping to opera.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
