Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
