Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
