doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
