So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
