He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
there was a trapeze. enough said
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Randomize
