I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
