do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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