Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
