I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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