"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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