is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
It's official drugs can't kill me
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize