im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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