Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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